This is a real life story of the last years of a successful sugarcane farmer and teacher from Bungoma. This sad tale chronicles unfortunate events that led to children suffering the curse of a father and what had to be done to reverse it.
A story is told of one family within Bungoma county. The family patriarch Mr. Ignatius Wafula (names changed) was a hard working father; farming sugar cane with success whilst excelling at his day job teaching in a local well performing secondary school.
By Wele’s grace, Mr. Wafula’s family of eight kids turned out fine. It was a beautiful family beautiful family with successful children who were lawyers, teachers, accountants and other noble professions. It was a picture perfect family, when the time came for it is our way, Wafula’s family was easily a poster child of the Bukusu saying: Afwile ebikele ne emurwe babana baliyo.
Wafula falls: A sad tale of the end to life of a model father that lead to a father cursing his own
Moreover, beyond the inheritance of a good education, Wafula had managed to build a mini empire for the benefit of his progeny. He had accumulated quite an impressive portfolio of land in Bungoma consisting of parcels within town and the municipality. At the time of his death, it is said that Wafula something in the region of eighty to a hundred acres of prime property within town Bungoma town just to mention.
But upon retiring getting his retirement benefits, this model father forgot his way back home. In his sunset years, Wafula found love once again and started cohabiting with a business woman who sold groceries within Bungoma town. The Bukusu say he followed the smell of fried onions that led him into the woman’s arms.
Anyone who has eaten salt in this world will tell you that loss of regular income is no joke. Retired and too old to farm, not to mention the death of the sugar industry in western Kenya, Wafula and his new love soon plundered through his retirement benefits. Having made a life for himself where he always had more than enough, this new normal didn’t sit well with Wafula.
A new khalinjola
Besides, he had a new young khalinjola who as we villagers like to say was like other pretty young thing (PYT) in a transactional relationship – a Pajero. Meaning, she burn through cash like it grew atop a kumukhuyu tree thanks to her high maintenance costs.
For the sparks to keep flying in this relationship, the fine wining and dining had to be. So Wafula made a decision that was the final straw in the strained relationship with his family. Mwalimu started to dispose off property without his family’s approval or knowledge.
The children who are all grown and professionals working in different blue chip organizations did not take it kindly when they found out that their father had sold their inheritance at a throw away price. They lamented that their father would have at least offered them a chance to buy the parcels and keep it on the family; instead strangers benefiting from their father’s desperation.
Mr. Wafula on the other hand was adamant. He would hear none of his children’s advice. He kept selling property left right and center.
Family feud that precipitated the curse of a father
The children tried to put a caution on Mr. Wafula’s property, but hit a snag when the law questioned their authority to enforce this wish. Frustrated and dejected, the children decided to confront the source of this mad cow disease that was afflicting their father: his concubine.
Let’s just say that it was not pretty. Nails dug into skin and clothes were torn. The heirs believed that the concubine was the one instructing Wafula to sell property. Worse, Wafula and his new catch had no children of their own; therefore, wherever to the concubine was siphoning away the proceeds Wele knows.
In response, Mr. Wafula’s concubine pressed assault charges against the heirs. Villagers say that the concubine wanted to show the ‘first house’ how powerful she was and what she was capable of. Rumor has it that things escalated, when she bribed the police to arrest Wafula’s children. Eight of Wafula’s nine cubs were thrown behind bars. On top of getting imprisoned, Wafula in his anger is said to have cursed his children. Double jeopardy.
After cooling off their heels in remand, the children sought services of an attorney – one of their siblings who had escaped the concubines dragnet -and they were later released after a week of incarceration. This imprisonment brought a lot of bitterness between Wafula and his children. The children would not hear nothing about their father.
Broken man, broken family
As is often the way with such happenings and relationships, Wafula started to ail and the concubine took off. She simply had not signed up for that. Mrs. Wafula in spite of her pain did the honorable, but her children were not so forgiving. So deep was the hurt in this family that the scions refused to send cash to their mother to take Wafula to hospital. When better sense finally caught up, the children elected to pay the money directly to the hospital instead of sending it. Such was the mistrust.
Watching from a distance, Mr. Wafula’s clan was very disappointed with the shameful drama unfolding in their kin’s home. Given his poor health, the Bukusu term those terminally ailing as having been rained on, Wafula’s elder brother asked Wafula to summon his children for a clan mediated reconciliation.
Wafula’s children rejected this invite. Instead, they retorted that they’d rather not get close to their father for fear of imprisonment. The shame of it all was just but a seasoning to the pain of being in jail thanks to to your own father.
Ailing
Once again, as it is with such things, Wafula’s health deteriorated and with the curse of a father on his lips Wafula moved on to the world of bakuka. What this meant was that atop the curse of a father, the children faced another curse.
In Bukusu culture, one does not fail to honor the summons of a person who has been ‘rained on’. Especially if the dying person is an elder such as a father, mother or grandparent. Such disrespect leads to a curse with serious implications. The late Mr. Wafula’s nine children faced this undesired outcome. Tragically so if it layered atop the curse of a father now deceased.
Death
His transgressions later in life not withstanding, also possibly in retribution, Wafula’s children with duty and gave their father a befitting send off. A man of Wafula’s stature in death must be honored with the full shebang of Bukusu death rituals. Any hesitancy to honor the dead this way leads to a curse from the ancestors.
Already with three strikes in the bag, Wafula’s children were wise not to court a fourth curse. Thus the late Mr. Wafula was honored accordingly devoid of any hesitancy. But when it came to burial rites, Bukusu customs dictated otherwise.
Lifting the curse of a father: How omukulo does it + details of a rare Bukusu burial custom
During Wafula’s funeral service, the first speaker was a Mr. Nato. Nato was a relative to the Wafulas but so distant the relation that the blood was considered weak. In the way the Bukusu call relatives, he was what is known as omukulo.
Nato’s speech addressed the departed soul rather than the mourners gathered. He told Wafula to go well without looking back. Nato reprimanded Wafula for cursing his children in anger.
He said one can get a wife, love the woman and she can die; or he can find another he loves and marry them also. Either way, a man is allowed to get a second woman and start a new life. A man, however, cannot play such games with his child.
“A child is a fruit of his loin gotten out of pleasure,” said Mr. Nato. A child cannot get another father, he went on to explain. He finished his speech by asking Wafula to forgive his children and his generation.
Ladies and gentlemen, alongside other serious roles, lifting the curse of a father as in the case of the Wafulas serves an opt example. The omukulo once done with the ritual, is given an animal and takes leave before the deceased is interred. Sitting through Wafula’s funeral, I couldn’t help notice that the countenance of fellow mourners, probably just like mine, were etched in deep reflection. Even if mulembe had been achieved, the experience had been humbling as it was uncomfortable.
In the end, so many questions
Why would a man work tirelessly to build a family then destroy it? What makes a heart so unforgiving that a child not only disobeys but also disown their father? And those home wreckers, how do they live with themselves? As my mother says, the devil comes in many ways. I choke on tears writing this. Everything on earth is indeed vanity.
