When a Bukusu couple are made one, Bukusu marriage customs observed, enganana taken place and dowry paid, it comes a time when culture demands that the couple celebrate the longevity of their union in a special way. The Maragoli had kuvika kesegese and kuruta as the traditional seals of marriage. It is the former that I find almost similar in intent to the sacred Bukusu marriage tradition khuboa chinyinja. In contemporary speak, I would equate khuboa chinyinja to the tin diamond (10 year) marriage anniversary.
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Why ten years? Well, in traditional Bukusu society by this time it’s expected that the couple will have the basics of a lasting marriage in the bag: a stable, maturing relationship as the couple now ‘know each other’; and more importantly from an African perspective, have brought forward a number of children for the of continuity of the bloodline.
Even in today speak, at ten years, most couples have achieved their desired family size. Their families might have weathered a few storms, ate together and cried together as in-laws. It could be even that some members of their families are no longer in talking terms, but it is okay. What is important is that the marriage needs to have withstood the test of time.
Preparations for khuboa chinyinja at the bride’s
Khuboa chinyinja like any other Luhya celebration feast is an expensive affair that needs a lot of planning. It all begins with the bride informing her family of her intention to wed in this way. Of note is that this ceremony is majorly financed by her family.
Thus the family where she’s married into would be sitting pretty rehearsing the rules of being good guests at the in laws.
The bride’s family is required to buy all household items needed for the ceremony and banquet. Of which, the most important ones are: a broom, water pot, plates, pans, cutlery and all a woman would need to make a home.
The bride’s family will also be required to slaughter an animal and gift the whole carcass to their daughter’s realtions by marriage. Everything but the offal.
This animal is to be eaten at the bride’s matrimonial home. However a portion of the slaughtered animal and brown obusuma made from millet or sorghum would be eaten by the bride and groom as the climax event of the Bukusu traditional wedding khuboa chinyinja.
Khuchula
The morning of the wedding, the animal is slaughtered and neatly packed in banana leaves, kamaru. The bride on the other hand would be striped naked in a ceremony known as Khuchula.
In this private ceremony, she gets dressed by a mature woman who herself has undergone the ceremony of khuboa chinyinja.
As she does this, the elderly woman advises the bride on how to take care of her home. How to protect her scions and how to be the custodian of the family’s customs, culture and heritage.
The elderly woman would have made a special ornament in form of threads from banana fibres that she puts around the bride’s waist. The ornament, chinyinja, will have two stings dangling on its opposite sides.
Khuboa Chinyinja
This ornament is what is called chinyinja. The art of tying the apparel around the brides waist is called khuboa chinyinja.
Khuboa is to tie in lubukusu. The elderly woman will ensure one string dangles on the front and the other at the bride’s back when dressing the bride. The bride will be advised to remain quiet the whole day till the ceremony is completed.
The bride will then be dressed in new clothes from the underwear, brassier, petticoat, official dress, shoes and head scarf etc where applicable. With this she will be ready to leave for her matrimonial home where the main feast awaits her.
At this point she sets off to her her matrimonial home dressed in new clothes carrying the slaughtered animal, household items and the brown flour.
This ceremony is done to all women married to Bukusu men. This has also been happening to Catholic nuns from the community. The Bukusu traditional wedding Khuboa Chinyinja is also conducted even when a Bukusu female loses her husband and did not have an opportunity to do this while he was still alive. She will be required to go to her home to undergo this ritual before burying her husband.
Back at Her Matrimonial Home
Back in her matrimonial home, family and very close friends will gather at the the bride and grooms home to wait for her. Traditional beer will be brewed in preparation for the feast.
The groom will be counseled on the importance of keeping his family unit together. In the counsel, the groom will be reminded his primary roles of protecting his family, providing their basic needs and the need for procreation to keep the family tree alive.
When the bride gets to her matrimonial home, she will have a stack of firewood on her head and the household items in her hands. She will stand right at her main entrance of her house and wait to be welcomed by her husband. The groom will come out to welcome her home. He will help remove the firewood from her head and carry the items in her hands into their house. They will just be the two of them in the house plus a cook.
Remember, the bride is still mum.
Dinner For Two
The groom’s family would have chosen someone preferably a female in law to the bride to cook the first meal for the bride and groom. The cook is supposed to be a young girl who is not yet married. She will prepare ugali using the brown flour the bride came with. Then also roast the meat that the bride came with to accompany the ugali.
When the meal is ready, the cook will inform the bride and groom. The groom will pay something to the cook as a token of appreciation. The hot ugali will be put on the groom’s hands straight from the fire, the groom will then give it to the bride. The bride and groom will eat their first meal. They will now be allowed to talk as they eat their first meal.
They can only call each other by their middle names and renew commitment to their marriage. The rule here is all the food must be finished by the bride and groom. This meal symbolizes cake cutting in a formal wedding where the bride and groom first partake of it before sharing with family and friends.
After the first meal, the bride and groom will then join the rest of the family and friends waiting for the feast outside the house. Feasting will then begin with song and dance. Food and traditional beer will be served in plenty. All this is done in the absence of the bride and groom’s children if any.
Sacred Ceremony
Growing up, I don’t remember witnessing the Bukusu traditional wedding Khuboa Chinyinja . I guess we must have been taken to our grandmas or aunty’s.
Guests will then leave at their own pleasure except one woman. This woman must have gone through the ceremony and would have been nominated by the bride or the groom’s family.
That night when everyone sleeps, the bride still has an unfinished task-disposing off Chinyinja. She will guard the ornament around her waistline not to be taken by anyone not even the groom. She is advised not to be intimate that night lest she looses Chinyinja.
Early the following morning when everyone is asleep, the nominated elderly woman will be given the brides apparel to go hide it somewhere where nobody can find it because it is considered sacred. The woman will then leave for her home after accomplishing her task. The ornament is left to rot after serving its purpose.
Cultural Significance of Bukusu Traditional Wedding Khuboa Chinyinja
- Khuboa Chinyinja is considered as a serious ceremony that once performed, man and woman become one till death puts them asunder.
- After the bride undergoing this ceremony, she is said to have been fully married.
- A woman who has not undergone Khuboa Chinyinja cannot perform important tasks in the community like cooking for her circumcised children.
- A woman who has not undergone this ceremony is also not to advise her girls when they get married because she has to finish her part first.
- Its only after a man had done all these to his wife, that he will have all rights to own her as a wife.
Nice one, what of sitekho
Sitekho on the way…